His story: I care about my wife and love her too but the truth is that I love men too. I realised this very late into the marriage that I am bisexual. She recently confronted me but I was appalled to know that she thought I was gay and that our marriage is a façade. I really don’t know how to say it… I masked my confusion with aggression and we fought. I know this is not fair to my wife and that I should let her know before she jogs her mind to another conclusion altogether. We also have a beautiful baby and I fear that I will lose them both if I tell her that I swing both ways. I don’t know how will she react.
Expert advice by Nidhi Behl Vats – Founder at Storyofsouls
For Her: I feel the most important thing is to understand what being gay/bisexual is? They are humans too, just that they feel more comfortable with people of same sex as well. This is no more a taboo, if it turns out to be true. Can you be his confidante, if you get to know this… how does this affect your life and emotions? According to me, it should not. Because he cares for you, he is a good human and has been fulfilling all his rituals and duties properly. He is very much in the relationship. I feel if you accept him, he will be more happy with you, as a partner. Still if you feel that your husband is not a right fit for you, you can talk to him, without offending him.
For him: It’s the best part that you discovered your reality. It is the first step. However, now you must speak to your wife about this reality. As the truth is the base of any relationship. If she cannot understand you then it’s not good to live a dual life. And if she understands you, then you are the happiest person. Do make sure that you decide and take her in confidence, and take a final call. Since you are married, the decision has to be both as a couple. Relationships are delicate, we need to take care. After all, this is a question of life for everyone including your family.
Aaira kaurr, Self Love mentor at Aanya Wellness: To sustain a marriage, efforts have to be done from both the sides. Honesty, respect and love are key ingredients to sustain it. Hiding, lying or manipulating the truth shakes the foundation of a relationship and it becomes hard to trust each other and at the same time have happy relations. So it is important to give space to each other and have clear and honest communication of what you think and feel, and help the other person to accept the reality and find a way to have a win-win life for both . As truth cannot be changed but only be accepted and adjusted to live with it.
Love story of Radha & Lord Krishna